Why is it that I don’t even want to be touched
by another, everything feels awkward and forced
like faking an orgasm or pretending my fellow New Yorkers
don’t make me sick on public transportation…
Would a carefree life feel boring? I would like to try it
Why is it that we search for excitement and or validations?
In so many defeating circumstances and situations?
I am seeking BALANCE now
I don’t want to rush, I don’t want a surprise
I don’t even want to date because I don’t want to
have to figure anybody out, I got enough
on my plate
I want a world that I LIKE and I want a world that
feels SAFE to be in,
Why do things have to be EXTREME?
Fuck hard, EAT big, Have more,
PLAY HARD, LIVE HARD, FIGHT HARD
(LOVE HARD?)
and still, we are never satisfied
If it is not my doubts concerning my company
then it is my own self-defeating thoughts
that play over and over again in my head
NYC in all its glory, with its loud rude crowded streets
I have become a product of my environment and
try to beat you to the punch and get the last word
I have been in overdrive for so long I don’t know how
to SLOW DOWN….It can be a DOG-EAT-DOG world
and I AM TIRED…